Have faith!

 Have faith, have faith. I always heard this line and often I said to my friends when they lose hope. Today, I realized it is easier said than done. 

I ask myself how we really to have faith in Allah? Macam mana kita boleh jadi seorang yang pasrah, redha dan menyerah bila kita tak boleh dapat apa yang kita nak? We all know, He knows what we not, and He is the best planner. But to practice it, it really takes time and we really need to believe in Him.

Waktu ini, aku sedih sangat. Aku rindu Mami. Aku rindu nak bercakap dengan dia, nak luahkan bila aku sedih, nak mengadu. Nothing can replace her, not even Abah. This is one of the thing that beyond my control. I cannot bring back her to this worl. I have to accept that she is not here anymore. Never will be. This sadden me the most. 

Next is, my study. It is also beyond my control when instruments are not working. But I always tell myself over and over this one shall pass. Everything will be okay at the end. Because that's how things worked for my master. I was stressed, I was overwhelmed but everything was fine at the end. 

Lastly, I miss A so much. I miss talking to him. I miss his bebelan. It's so sad when you can't talk to someone. I really want to call him but I know I would look miserable and pathetic. That's not what I waant. I know this feeling will go away one day but to go through it again, I just can't. There are times when I lost it. 

Today is one of the sad moments in my life. When everything just not right. I miss Mami. Instruments are not working. My jodoh is nowhere to be found. My heart sank. 

'Have faith, have faith.' I told myself. Again.